This is so hard, I can't keep him out of my mind. He's always there, no matter what I'm doing the thought of him holding me close keeps sneaking in and taking over. There's so many emotions in my body, and they're fucking with my brain. I can't shut it off, I can't stop crying. I want to move back home, so badly, move back to the city I know. Back to the city where all my friends are, my family. Back to the country I understand what the people are saying without even have to think twice.
I gotta stop making everything so hard for myself, I gotta let myself be able to get to know this city, this country. I gotta let myself feel good. But it is so hard..